Sponsored By

bozodog

Actual Police Responses...

Recommended Posts

The following were taken off of actual police car videos around the

country:

#15 "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll

stretch out after you wear them awhile."

#14 "Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate

a worthless document."

#13 "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

#12 "Can you run faster than 1,200 feet per second? In case you

didn't know, that is the average speed of a 9 mm bullet fired from my gun."

#11 "So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I

can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"

#10 "Yes, Sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think

it will help. Oh .. did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"

#9 "Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do

that again, or I'll give you another ticket."

#8 "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are

drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

#7 "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where

you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey $#! *!."

#6 "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a

toaster oven."

#5 "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."

#4 "Just how big were those two beers?"

#3 "No sir we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas,

but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."

#2 "I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend

of yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail."

and the best one . . .

#1 "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets?....... You're

right, we don't. Sign here."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...